Year gone by

Hmm I don't know what the next step is in my life, do I work on? Pursue a job in IT seen as I am doing a part time course in it? I don't think I can answer any of those questions yet. I've been thinking alot lately about the past year (yeah I know I really shouldn't) but this year will go down as the worst so far.

I'm not even optimistic about xmas, not one sodding bit, have the years events made me go cold to the whole xmas spirit!! I think I'm just growing up an getting on with it, or is it because its the first xmas in a few years Ive not had a partner to share it with?

I will look foward to the close of the year an spend a new years eve with friends.. for the first time unbelievably!

Thanks readers

Merry Xmas an a Happy new year! (haha :P)

Young Love

I see people around me, friends new an old and some of them are telling me that they're getting married and are even discussing kids. Now I don't want to sound harsh cause I'm happy for all of them I really am, but isn't 19 a bit young to be even talking about these things, especially when they tell me low long they've been together, some even just 6 weeks!

I mean I don't think some of them even consider that living with someone 24 hours day is completely different to living apart. And as for kids, do they not think of not just the responsibility to raise them but the finance and hard work it takes to do it.

The list

I know I have a lot of time to do these things (well hopefully) but I thought I'd just share a few things I want to do before I kick the bucket (yeah this list was inspired by the movie)

1. Skydive
2. Walk a part of the Great wall of China
3. Complete the London marathon 
4. Drive the car of my dreams
5. Get a tattoo
6. See the pyramids 

Comment back and let me know what things you'd really like to try/do. 

TDK

Direction

Where am I going?

What am I doing?

Where will I be in 10 years?

I have no idea. I'm lost and don't know what to do with my life. Do I want a career? Do I want to start working full time now?  Do I want to go to University? 

Ah well I better get thinking or cross my fingers every Saturday Evening. 

Chapter 2 Friends

Chapter 2 Friends

Before I begin I need to remind readers that these are only parts of my life, I could write about much more and may release some more in the future.

As many I'm about to write about I've always found it difficult to make new friends. I hung around with the same group of people in secondary school as I did in primary school. Even then there were only a few people who I considered good friends, as irritating as they may have been at times we had a few laughs.

Anthony A - Well I've known this guy since nursery. He's a bit of an odd character I think, well now anyway. He's always joking in a sarcastic manner whenever i speak to him. Not a day had passed when I've spoke to him an got a sarcastic sort of joke. We always called each other stupid nicknames for each other. The ones that stuck though were 'mophead' for him as I called him because of his long and often greasy looking hair at the time, whilst I was dubbed 'egghead' for apparently having an egg shaped head :S. He was one of good mates and best mate since nursery all the way till the first year at college where we just grew apart. I remember how we used to have hardcore wrestling matches, smashing each other over the head with baking trays and other things, slamming each others faces into things, MAD haha. Even on one occasion when he threw a dart straight at my knee and it stuck in haha. If not one of my good mates certainly the only person I considered my best friend at school. I talk to him now and then when he decides to show up on msn, we play snooker occasionally but he seems to spend all his time with his girlfriend. (he needs to read my blog, bro's before whores an all that)

Daniel H - Again known this guy from nursery, we didn't always hang out together at school. He's a funny decent guy and has definitely grown up a lot since leaving school, his Mrs has tamed him me thinks haha. The water fights we had in summer always started at his house haha. Always talk to him on msn and arrange to go for a walk and a chat or a game of snooker once a week. We did hang out quite a lot in Y11 when he used to be part of the group of people I used to play snooker with every Friday night.

Christopher P - Someone else I've known from nursery. Had always hung around really until about Y10 when we just kind of stopped for no reason and just talked now and then. Think he was doing a course outside school so I didn't see him much. We had a silly disagreement in Y7 which apparently was either about taking piss out of each others family or a pen =S I really can't remember, think it was a mix of the two and the pen was the last straw haha. We had a fight, well I say fight it was more like I threw punch then he took a punch then i did an so on, in the face we created a 'fight fight fight' crowd and everything haha. We were talking again the next day haha. Part of the Friday night snooker club. See him around Hillsbrough every now and then.

Lee R - Another one from nursery. What happened to this guy? He was one of my mates up to Y8/9 or something suddenly decided he would go about insulting me for the rest of my school years, what a dick. We had a few scraps come year 10/11, looking back at it I don't know how the hell I went so long without giving that guy a smack, throwing stuff at me everyday, not talking to me. He's a dick who fell out with everyone after school so good riddance to him, don't know what he's doing now. Hopefully not doing so well for himself today because he is the main reason I didn't enjoy my last few years at school. Twat.

Megan + Edward H - Brother and Sister, our mums are good friends. We used to hang out after school at either my house or theirs. We used to just hang out playing video games and stuff or doing a jigsaw at their house when we were little. Don't really speak to them that much anymore. They were part of the Friday snooker group.

Anthony B - Witty funny guy, met him late primary school years when he moved to our area. Not sure if he's up to much nowadays according to Daniel H ever since he was involved in an incident an got an axe in the back of the head. Ouch. How he lived I have no idea, glad he's alright though.

Ryan I - We were best of mates for about a year in primary school. Spent loads of time just chilling on field opposite my house, playing video games, watching films, even going to the fun fair, walking the dogs, cap guns :D haha. Then one day we were on field hanging out and some y7 girls thought it'd be cool to try and introduce us to smoking, he took the bait and then stopped hanging out with me and started hanging out with them instead.

John M - Part of the Friday snooker crew, didn't really hang out just knew Daniel H and others from being in our class. Sound guy never had a problem with him, we all drunk few of his dad's beers a few times after snooker. Don't know what he's up to now. Think he installs radiators or something.

Brett T - He was a cheerful guy during our school years. Never really hung out just always got on well around school. I remember the thing I remember most about Brett is when he had a friendly fight with Lee R ( before he became a dick) when they were fighting Lee choked him out near enough using his legs. We had to pull Lee off him. His face was bright red. See him now and then and have a chat when he's got time.

Jared W - He joined Myers Grove when he moved to UK from South Africa. Chatted a lot when he was new and settling in. Last spoke/saw him at Shane's brothers funeral. Looked like he changed a lot, unfortunate circumstances when we did speak.

Conal R - I met Conal during my first year first at college, we were in the same form and media studies class. He's big with the fashion an changes his hair quite a lot. I spent a good part of my first year at college playing snooker with him and then rushing back to get to media studies. We were both very competitive at Pro Evo as well which was a laugh. We went to C4's The Games once at Don Valley Stadium I remember, it was free though which was good but it was absolutely shocking, we spent most of our time just waiting around for the celebs to emerge run 100m then disappear lol. Also been to a Wednesday FA Cup match ( I know being a Utd fan I kept that quiet but I like watching football) they lost 4-2 in an entertaining game.

Chris C - Met him in college during my first year as we both took AS Law. He is a genuine down to earth guy. Plays video games a lot. We often used to go to the cinema an review and criticise films haha. Saw him in Corp the other week, he has changed a bit, but only for the good in showing more confidence.

Cherie O H - She's so sweet and kind, easy going and when she has opposing views she'll let you know her opinion on the matter. I can't remember how I met Cherie I think it may have been one of Riccardo's parties and teenageforums.com. Cherie always makes me laugh and smile whenever I see her with her witty jokes and her 'innits being a chav dic ed' hahaha. She is a little insecure I think and she really shouldn't be because she's a really nice person.

James S (jimbob) - We first met in Pizza Hut, Shane, Cherie and myself were going to pizza hut for dinner and he came with Cherie. We didn't immediately speak. I can't actually remember how exactly I started talking to him and what about. He's a sound guy with whom he seems to fall out with quite a few people I think I'm one of a few who hasn't fallen out with him ever. He was my closet friend during a relationship I had and seemed to know what to say to comfort me when I had a problem. We were gym buddies last year where we both decided it was time we did something to drop the weight, we lost loads. We need to have a proper catch up sometime soon.

Jessica Kirk - She is a nice, kind friendly person. I first met Jess when I started doing parkour. We both used to go to the parkour gym every Thursday night and train and mess around flipping into the foam pit. Things got kind of awkward I find after her and Shane went out together which is probably why she stopped hanging out with us as much. Then she went to university so don't see her all that much now anyway. The last time I saw her I remember was back in January for her 19th Birthday.

Leon E - This guy is cool. Easy to get on with and was often my drinking buddy alongside jimbob during early 2007. I first met him through Chris C when on trip to the cinema and instantly got on with him. Currently working full time and engaged. Personally I wouldn't get engaged so young but if he's happy then good on him.

Will D - What can I say? Like me, he's a man of few words. Can be quite sarcy to me towards me I feel although most times he's joking. Traceur. Part of the tf walk, that's the thing I remember most other than when we train in Sheffield.

Ben Nuttall - I first met Ben at a Saturday parkour jam, though didn't actually speak proper until one of Riccardo's parties. He's quite unpredictable to how he responds to certain things. In love with Pie for some silly reason (not the consumable but the mathematical term) I have no idea why haha. Sound guy and I find that given different situations we've both been in we've both been able to give each other some sound advice. Bro's before Ho's haha love it.

Jon H - Not known this guy for very long. He seems a like a decent guy and we have interesting conversations about anything really. I hope he stays in touch with all of us he's knows from Sheffield when he goes to university in Manchester. Me and Jon have both come out of a similar situation this year and can relate to each other like that and I don't know about him but meeting new people like Jon certainly made things better for me.

Rhiannon Davison - I first met Rhi in town with Shane an the 3 of us spent the day going around Sheffield whilst Shane took pictures. I've known her for about 6 weeks max and I already consider one of my good mates. She's so sweet, caring and easy to get along with its unreal! Her friendship along with others has helped me greatly to get over the pain of a long term relationship. She's always fun to be with, a good laugh and almost always smiling or singing. I know there is still a lot to learn about her because she doesn't discuss everything and that's fine, I do hope that one day we'll become really good mates that she'll be able to turn to me for advice or whenever she has a problem as I try to help out all my friends when needed. She listened to my story and gave me some good advice, but I think the real reason shes helped is for always being a really cheerful smiley person.

Danny 'Hardcore' Wood - He is a top guy and very cool, calm and collective. When i first met Danny he was performing long fist kung fu and I thought it was the strangest thing, along with his meditations, to do in public. I've grown used to it now and if it makes you feel better maybe I should consider trying it. He has helped me out with parkour, different methods of warming up, dating and relationship advice. His attitude is always a positive one and never fails to make me laugh with his humour. He is a great guy and to me a good friend. I am delighted that he is engaged now. I haven't seen him smile so much. So much good 'chi' is coming from Danny, being around the guy makes me feel positive. I'm glad he's found someone and I really hope it works out for them.

Alice Milner - I first met Alice back in 2006 at Riccardo's first house party. Since then we have become really good friends and she is definitely one of my best. That is probably because she's honest, isn't afraid to say whats on her mind, easy to talk to, funny and has something to say on everything. We have had our disagreements in the past but nothing which we haven't been able to work out. Over the 2 years of knowing each other we've been through quite a lot together. The 1st break up with Wayne, the 2nd break up with Wayne, the tf walk, my first break up, helping her out and comforting her when shes been upset, my 2nd break up. Through all this and more we have been there for each other like the best friends we are. I'm glad I have a friend like her, she's one of a kind and I love her to bits. I just wish people would stop assuming were a couple haha. She's enjoyed being single now and has told me she wants a relationship again. I really hope she finds someone that will treat her right because shes been through enough crap!!!

Shane Christopher Alexander Rounce - He's my best mate. I met Shane at college in 2005. We never really hung out much or talked for the first half of the college year. Was only when we started chatting during form class and business studies and pizza hut (regularly haha) that we became friends. Then one day he invited me to the parkour gym and my first reaction was 'what the hell are they doing?' But when I saw it being done on the streets I thought it looked brilliant. He also introduced me to not only teenageforums.com but the internet altogether! Shane's always a laugh to be around although when I first heard his crude jokes about cripples and down syndrome I was shocked but I guess that's what made it funny. I mean nowadays its just normal for me to expect a crude joke. Doing parkour and being around someone quite gobby haha has made me a more confident person. I have to thank Shane to for inviting me to Riccardo's first house party because it is where I first met a lot of the friends I have today. However I know as a close friend that the humour and laughter I see everyday is only a front to how he truly feels since mid last year. Towards the end of the year he seemed like a he was getting back to his old self and then his relationship ended after 10 months. Shane was there for me when I came out of my last relationship, I'm just sorry I wasn't there for him as I was to busy on cloud 9 =/ lesson learnt. 

I am who I am because of everyone

Family

Before I begin I need to remind readers that these are only parts of my life, I could write about much more and may release some more in the future.

Chapter 1 Family

My Brother,
One of the most important people in my life for the obvious reason that he is my brother and despite little petty arguments can get along really well. When I look at my brother I see very similar characteristics to me as you can imagine and what I love most about him him is that he is the typical older brother, always looks out for me and manages to make me laugh when I feel down. If I think about it I bet I could count as many times he's made me smile then the times he's made me cry, what older brothers do I suppose when you're growing up. I need to spend more time with him because as we grow up we'll grow apart.

My Mum,
How on earth would I cope without her?!?! Cooks, cleans, washes my clothes. As a loving mother does. I often feel that my mum isn't appreciated enough for looking after 3 grown men haha (note to self, HELP OUT!!!). She has told me that of course obviously she loves us lads (the boys), she did hope she would have a daughter, 'its alright for you Rich at least you can do things with the lads', she was of course referring to lads stuff like when the 3 of us go and play snooker etc. I think my mum is happy, but very stressed with all of us, for not helping out and being lazy. I think if my mum had had at least one daughter she would be over the moon because it means she would have been able to do girl things like playing with hair and make up and going shopping with her etc. Not that she isn't happy with what she's got. I will be calm when been given instruction and do us I'm told straight away. I hope this will help her calm down.

My Dad,
He is a workman, a labourer, a last generation representation of knowing what a hard days work really is. Working at the same place since he was 16. Dirty work Mon-Fri 8-5. I wonder how he has managed to do it for all these years. There aren't many like that now. I'm not sure if he enjoys his work but he definitely has grit it out if he doesn't and why? To provide his family with a good standard of living. He is one of the few people I turn to when I have a problem. I have started to talk to him about what's going on in my life recently and I believe it has brought us even closer together. Our conversations will be about anything recent or have i heard of this and that. I hated him taking me walking every Sunday as a kid but now I'm grown up I'm so glad he did because I have seen some wonderful places/views that without early encouragement I may not have seen as many growing up in the city. I feel he is quite happy and content with his life, the last 20 years of his life though I think have had a similar pattern, not just because of work but because he comes home from work, showers, eats, watches TV and goes to bed. This happens 5 days a week for the past so many years. I think that now me and my brother are older and can look after ourselves he needs to get in touch with friends and colleagues and do something outside work. But if he's happy enough in front of the telly chatting to my mother every night, who cares =). Relationship advice, financial advice, things to be aware of and advice to live by. A few of things we talk about.

Grandad (dad's dad),
My dad's enjoyment of walking and camping came from somewhere, it must be in the blood haha. My Grandad must be one of the most active OAP's ever. He is constantly going on walking and diving holidays. I don't even know he's away sometimes he goes away that much and usually for at least a month. I find out about his travels usually when he makes a pleasant unexpected visit for a cup of tea and talks about where he's been. I know little about his past, however I do know that he did go to war, it's something that I've always wanted to ask him about and listen to his stories...but I dare not to ask because my mother says he doesn't like to talk about it and it makes me wonder what he must have witnessed during battle. I also know that he and my nan ran a cafe together as my dad always points it out whenever we pass the area or talk about a local celebrity (forgot who he said) always came in and was quite a regular when in town. Whether there's truth in this I don't know but I choose to believe it. My parents have told me that when my nan died he became really depressed and when still grieving he went to Jamaica for a few months and then came back married after only knowing her for 3 months or so. She moved to the UK along with who I consider step uncles and aunt. My grandad and his new bride went on to have a child of their own, this is how I have a 15 year old half aunt. He also ran his own garage when he closed down the cafe until he retired. He knows his cars and from what I can remember had a very nice sports car at the time until my nan made him sell it. He is now separated and moved out of the home I've always known him from because she is living there and will not give him a straight divorce or something. Family members of mine were always suspicious about her intentions but even if they were to get a passport at least I gained a half Aunt.

Grandad (mum's dad),
I have few memories of him as a young child and never saw him in his final years. 'We will all love and cherish the memories you have given us' ... one of my aunts speaking at his funeral. I was 15 when he died. I could hardly hold back the tears knowing that I have like only one memory of him. Me, my mum, aunts and him were playing cards and dominoes as I had just learnt to play, I was young. My tears really started flowing when my aunt went on to talk about how proud he looked when he walked down the aisle to give my mum away. It is always the picture I often try to imagine when he's mentioned in conversation. My mum was in bits as you can imagine and I often had to comfort her, I remember when she was going through old photos and showing me them and telling a story with each one. My mum, aunts and uncles often go see his grave, maybe I should go with them sometime.

Nan Eileen (mum's mum),
I really don't know much about her other than she does often use bad language (well from what I can remember). She is still with us, I definitely need to visit her sometime because I haven't seen her since my grandads funeral.....4 years ago or maybe more. I know she brought 7 people into this world. 7 kids!!!
How on earth did my grandparents manage? I really don't know. 2 boys and 5 girls, sounds like mayhem!!! Well they've all done well for themselves and they are both proud of each of them as now they've all grown up they can appreciate even more how they managed to cope. I remember when my mum told me that she would have to have the lower part of her leg amputated. I can't remember what infection/disease she had. Heard they all (aunts uncles mum and her) laughed to this. What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen.

Great Grandad (dad's grandad)
My dad told me how when he went to war he had to change his name for some reason on birth certificate so we never actually knew his age precisely because he had 2 birth certificates, all very confusing what I was told anyway.
Not sure how many childhood Sunday's I went to my great Grandads. I can picture him sat in his little cottage perfectly. I remember the blanket used on his couch, colourful handmade blankets and such on his rocking chair, the little foot rest I used to sit on, his black and white TV. I could go on about the detail I remember, even the bananas in a fruit bowl in the bathroom haha. When he had an accident at home and became blind for a while, mind you his sight and hearing was never good when I started visiting. The kettle whistling, one room upstairs and every time I helped out cleaning. The park that was close, the hill me and my brother and cousins used to play tag on. The autumn season playing conkers, throwing sticks at the tree to try and get new ones, the winter season, making a giant snowman with my brother and dad, the tree that had animals carved into it, when my brother broke his arm when he fell from a tarzan swing, the way he used to make me laugh by wobbling his cheeks and making funny noises but most of all..... Fizzynaily =)

Nan (Dad's nan i think)
Was to young to remember much cause she died when I was young. I've seen old photo's of her holding me as a baby. I can remember her waving us off in the car, at least I think I can, not sure whether or not it was a dream or not. But I remember what she looked like without the need of photos. Not sure how often I visited but I always remember the orange toy digger that my brother got and always got a treat, usually smarties I think haha

Aunts, Uncles and Cousins
Well I don't know much about some of my Aunts and Uncles. The Aunts I often saw were my mums twin sisters, Stella and Wendy. This was mainly because their kids were around the same age as me and my brother. Stella and Phil have Craig, Kay and Rebbecca whilst Wendy and Jeff had Christopher, Nicholas and Thomas. I often used to see my cousins growing up. Every Friday and Saturday me, my brother, Chris and Nick would go to boys brigade at the church my parents got married at. Thinking back about it all I can remember is having to prayer and then doing activities like drawing/colouring in, sewing and cooking I think =S. The best bit though was afterwards when they opened up the sweet shop and then going back to my cousins for a bit playing video games and watching wrestling.

Shortly after leaving the boys brigade my mum/aunts started visiting my nan every Friday evening and still currently do. For many years however my cousins Craig, Kay and Rebbecca would come round and we'd play video games, board games, wrestle and make up silly little games. There are plenty of fun memories though before that. Every other Saturday I'd go to their house and do exactly the same except you could play hide and seek in their house because it was much bigger. I can also remember the summers when we they used to have a big water slide and BBQ in their garden. The castle playground that was made was memorable. I can remember the day when we destroyed it a few years ago. I remember the birthday parties as well that took place at their house, playing party games and jelly and ice cream haha. The time did start coming (during the teen years) where this just got boring and would instead go to the snooker with my school mates instead.

Chris and Nick visited every other Sunday to play video games and we used to watch wrestling and see who could do what move. Nothing crazy thank god haha.

My cousins were a big part of my growing up and I don't see them much anymore.

My Aunt Shelia and Uncle Rob are really nice and have always got on with them. My Aunt Shelia used to work in the nursery I was going to whilst I was there. I saw them the other week. It'd been a while and they had brought my little cousins from Spain, Danny and Mario. I would very much like the picture that was taken the other day. How cools that though? I have an Aunt younger than me and a cousin called Mario haha.